Why can't I accept illness and death?

Its very easy to feel depressed about things like these, expecially if your a compionate person. Your not alone. Illiness and detath is scary, but you shouldnt let it control every aspect of your life. Try to do something nice for him, it doesnt have to be overly extreme. You could hold open a door for him or pick up his pencil if it falls, just little acts of kindness to show you care. I'm not sure what religion you are but I have had many people close to me die. Its very sad and hard to go through, but for me praying makes it better. God did not intend for people to suffer or die, that was a result of original sin. But he is always there to hold our hand through tough times, all you have to do is ask. Try praying for the kid, that he get better or that if he die, he will have made his peace and can be with God in heaven.